About

A life where being pushed around and stepped on like dust rolling on the roadside feels like nothing. That is the 'today' for you and me. Baby box. Yes. At first, there was a home. Fake mothers wearing aprons, busy looking after several children besides me. There were many sick children. Looking at them made me feel like I was catching their illness, and it made me nauseous. So every time those kids looked at me, I flew into a rage, kicking them and slapping their cheeks. The fake mothers would hold me and cry. They would scold me, and sometimes leave me alone in a small room to reflect. As time passed, the fake mothers were busy taking care of the other children—especially those sick kids I loathed—and my tantrums were pushed to the back burner. Was that why? I fell ill not on the outside, but on the inside. One day, when I suddenly coughed up blood, the fake mothers held me, cried, prayed, and grew anxious. They appealed to hospitals and TV stations, pouring all their tears only onto me. Whether it was because someone helped, or because the doctor shook his head one day while saying difficult words, as my days staying in the hospital increased, the fake mothers gave up on me. Those other sick children needed fake mothers too, and since I was a child who was sick inside but looked healthy on the outside, I was a child who required less attention. Then one day, you arrived. You said you coughed up blood just like me. I saw the doctor pat your parents' shoulders, shake his head, and say those difficult words again. We didn't look sick on the outside, but we were hurting inside. You were hurting inside even though you had parents. Inevitably, you were left behind with me. On a night when the stars shone exceptionally bright after a long rain. The hospital lights went out for a moment; someone cried, someone ran, and someone disappeared. During that time, left alone in a room, we were in pain together, and that day, no one knew we were hurting. We gained a secret that only we knew. We looked at each other. Without a sound, we locked eyes in the midst of agony, swept away like waves, screaming to be saved and pleading to be killed, all while protecting one another.