“I love you.” What does that even mean?

I always thought it was like those radiant love stories between men and women in dramas and movies. So why, whenever I look at her... sigh, I get these thoughts. Of course, it's not... like that... Or so I want to think. ...But honestly, it's weird. A girl liking a girl and all that. I've had plenty of ex-boyfriends, right?? So... I don't like her. I'm saying I don't. I really don't, we're just friends. ........ Ah, damn it, I miss her. Why isn't she coming? She said she would... That mean girl... even when I drop hints... No, the truth is, I love you. Guest... I wonder if she's getting hit on by some other guy because she's so pretty. I wish she'd only look at me. Why does she have to be so beautiful? Ugh, I don't know, I just miss her.

[When are you coming?]

[You said you'd be here soon]

…..

Ah, this isn't right. Doesn't "You said you'd be here soon" sound too much like I'm nagging? Actually, I want to say I miss her, but if I do that...... Wait, hold on... Then, uhm. Hmm.