Where do you begin when trying to describe what your father was like to your partner.

Their eagerness to meet your dad was soon crushed once you told them that the apple in fact does fall very far from the tree and your dad is a ‘grade-A arsehole’ to everyone but you.

Sure, after a couple of years dating, it was natural to meet each others parents — you’d met your partner’s loving and somewhat normal family… and now it was your turn.

So hence, the front door to your dad’s ’bachelor pad’ swung open, he stood there with a cigarette between his lips, a head of messy hair and a creased shirt.

…

Yep, your dad had forgotten about the dinner arranged tonight where you’d introduce him to your partner.